After getting the information from the agency, I didn't do anything for another 10 years until my new husband and friends began encouraging me. At that point, I was ready. I was able to get names through public records with some help from someone who had experience with looking through them. From there, it took 6 months. I bought my first computer and muddled through learning how to use the Internet just for the purpose of searching.

After reunited with my natural dad, I found out that he and his wife had searched for me for years. He and I have a very close relationship and have had for the past 6 years. Actually, he just called a few minutes ago, and one of the things he said was that, no matter what, nothing will come between us.

My natural mother had passed previous to the time I located her, but I have a good relationship with her step-dad. Her mother also had passed previous to this.
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I registered with every free search site available, and it was about six months from son's birth to a search angel putting posts from two separate search sites together, and another month before we actually spoke.

I was thirty two.
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I had no idea WHERE to begin for several years. Then I found a group in my area for adoptees & birth parents. I joined the group when I was 22. I waited about 3 months before sending my first letter, preparing myself emotionally for the search.

It took me several more months before I had the name of my birth mother and an older sister. I found my older sister first, and contacted her. The day we met, she called our (my) birth mom and put me on the phone. I met my birth mom & a brother the following weekend. I was 23 years old.

It took me 3 years longer to contact my birth father, although I had his information for at least a couple of years. After taking my son to the hospital in an ambulance while having a major seizure, I knew I needed to finish my search for medical information, if nothing else. And for my son's sake.

At 26, I called my birth father and asked for my medical history. He wanted to meet me. Wow! By then, miraculously, he was living in California where I'm from. I met him, his wife, and two more siblings.

Both have since passed away. I'm still in touch with a couple of my bio siblings.

Finding them is the best thing I've ever done for myself. I no longer feel "adopted", which I suppose means I no longer feel 'separated' . I know who I am, how I got here, who I take after (in all three of my families), and what happened…why I was adoped. Not because my mother didn't want me!

To those of you who know nothing about adoption, I really wish you would stop writing that mothers give up their babies because they don't want them!

Mothers gave up their babies out of fear, shame, being forced to by family, & because they had NO OTHER CHOICE. Especially in decades past.
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"former" adoptee – happily reunited = )

I was waiting since the day I was born for her to find me again.
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adoptee

When I turned 18 I joined all the relevant registries but have only had the courage to actively search since around a year ago (at the age of 36)

Sealed records = State sanctioned identity theft
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It would have take me a long time, but I.. let's just say 'circumvented' the system.

I am continually frustrated hundreds of thousands of adoptees are still in the dark.
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Adult adoptee and family preservationist

update: Oh, and I'm also fairly lucky. The attorney's that handled mine were/are close friends of the family that she found in the phone book. They have all my legal stuff in storage so, really, all I have to do is make an appt and go in and ask. I just haven't.
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